Date:4/25/2026-5/6/2026
Destination: Poland, Germany
Goal: Energylandia, Phantasialand, Europa Park, Poland Culture, Germany Culture
Distance: 4700 Miles
Means of Travel: Flying, Train, Tour Bus
Potential Credits: 40
Day 3
Now, who doesn’t love a solid city day? Whether it’s the politeness of Paris, the exemplary behavior of Amsterdam, the affordability of Copenhagen, or the excitement of Brussels, there’s something about exploring an iconic European city.
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| IMAGE DESCRIPTION: Before the large walls of a castle flying the Polish flag sits a copper dragon statue amid trees. |
While today was set aside as a flex day to probably go back to Energylandia, which would I rather do? Ride the train an hour each way for ten Wacky Worms and other credit whore trash, or spend the day exploring castles and dragons?
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| IMAGE DESCRIPTION: A series of buildings with tarnished spires atop a red brick wall. |
I'd booked us kind of an insane day. I got us tickets to Wawel Castle (pronounced "VA-vul"), Oskar Schindler's Enamel Factory, two days ago I'd promised Drew we would enter St. Mary's Basilica as we saw the night we arrived, and I had us dinner reservations for Czarna Kaczka, which is Polish for Black Duck, one of the most-recommended restaurants int he city.
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| IMAGE DESCRIPTION: Jarrett stands before a castle palace atop a red brick wall with ramparts. |
I’d done the castle thing a few times, most notably last spring in Luxembourg at Vianden. That was more a medieval military castle, built up on a hill with ramparts and weaponry on display. Wawel, on the other hand, was a bit later in period and more focused on its role as a dwelling for Poland’s kings and queens.
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| IMAGE DESCRIPTION: A series of towers and domes for a cathedral, ornately built from brick, slate, and copper. |
“You could easily spend six hours there,” we were told of this place on the Auschwitz/Salt Mine tour. There were two tickets you could purchase: Wawel Castle and Wawel Cathedral. Having promised Drew we would go to St. Mary’s at some point, we did the castle now as he had never seen one. Upon climbing the castle walls, you find yourself heading past the cathedral, notice the dragon gargoyles.
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| IMAGE DESCRIPTION: A black and white shot of a series of mezzanines with balustrades and arches overlooking a courtyard. |
Your tour of the castle begins in this courtyard. Here there's tickets, luggage room, kind of the base for your adventure.
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| IMAGE DESCRIPTION: A chandelier hangs from an ornate wooden ceiling in a white-walled room with tapestries and paintings on the wall. In the corner sits a small porcelain tower with ornate patterns painted upon it. |
As I said, this castle was a bit more "Bridgerton" and a little less "Lord of the Rings," so you won't be seeing pots of stew over roaring fires. One of the rooms, for a more modern Polish politician, even had a rotary telephone in it! But they did have the cool wine chillers you see in this photo, these towers were packed with ice to keep the alcohol cool.
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| IMAGE DESCRIPTION: On a wooden dresser sits a blue and white porcelain pot. On the wall hangs a painting of a man surrounded by animals with a castle in the background. |
Much emphasis here was on the art that adorned these castle corridors, if you've ever been to the Rijksmuseum in Amsterdam it's a similar vibe.
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| IMAGE DESCRIPTION: On a red wallpaper hangs a wood painting of the Virgin Mary and baby Jesus flanked by two angels playing instruments, with shiny gold halos around Jesus and the angels' heads. |
The Virgin and Child Enthroned By Two Angels, according to the audio guide, is one of the most famous paintings held here. This whole room had stunning goldwork on the paintings.
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| IMAGE DESCRIPTION: Atop a marble fireplace hangs a wide painting of a man with a lyre surrounded by animals, with a bleak hellscape in the background. |
Don't look back! This painting showed the Greek myth of Orpheus and Eurydice, famously portrayed in a dirty industrial setting in the Broadway musical Hadestown. I absolutely love Hadestown, so this was great to see. This shows the tragic end to the story, in which Orpheus escapes Hades's underworld but looks back at the following Eurydice, trapping her in hell forever.
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| IMAGE DESCRIPTION: A domed ceiling shows a series of ornate gold paneling and trim atop a chamber. |
This was probably the most beautiful room in the castle, both for this ceiling...
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| IMAGE DESCRIPTION: Out a window protected by netting, one can see across the rooftops of Krakow, including St. Mary's Basilica. |
...and for the best view in Krakow! That's St. Mary's Basilica we saw on day zero, and plan to visit later today! Shame about the netting in the way, though.
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| IMAGE DESCRIPTION: A jade green clock with ornate gold leaf accents. |
If it strikes four times, Vecna snaps your neck and deletes your eye sockets. I love clocks as art pieces, for some reason.
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| IMAGE DESCRIPTION: A Chinese porcelain vase showing a person doing tai chi. |
This room was darker and had more of an assorted art collection, including some Eastern influences. I know from my tai chi training that this is a movement called "play the lute."
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| IMAGE DESCRIPTION: A white statue showing the crucifixion of Christ with several detailed figures at the base of the crux. |
This crucifixion scene in the next room was insane! While it wasn't quite life-sized, it was still massive and full of detail. Imagine how much it had to take to sculpt all these people?
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| IMAGE DESCRIPTION: A statue of an angelic armored warrior with a gold outfit and wings wielding a spear and a shield reading "QUIS VI DEUX." |
There was also an incredible Archangel Michael in the same room, with a beautiful gold finish.
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| IMAGE DESCRIPTION: A marble bust of a portly man sits before a window overlooking Krakow, draped with a thin white curtain, silhouetting the statue. |
Obligatory narcissistic room of important white men's busts in a fancy hallway. I can't remember who this was, but he made for a good "villainous king" photo here.
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| IMAGE DESCRIPTION: A jade-colored castle room with a window, wine cooler, and portrait with an ornate wooden ceiling. Around the upper walls, a painted scene shows knights jousting. |
From here, the castle changes a little. It gets more colorful, a little dimmer, and a little more medieval. This was the tournament room, named for the scene of a joust around the upper wall trim.
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| IMAGE DESCRIPTION: Around an ornate wooden ceiling hanging a chandelier, the wall shows |
This room had a similar setup, but featured a military scene of an army marching into battle.
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| IMAGE DESCRIPTION: A tapestry shows a red shield-shaped coat of arms decorated with a crown and white eagle. |
This was badass! A tapestry here shows the famous red coat of arms and eagle, so famously associated with Poland. If you bought a souvenir here, have played as Poland in Civilization or a similar game, you've probably seen this.
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| IMAGE DESCRIPTION: An ornate wooden armchair sits in a room atop some red velvety stairs before a tapestry showing Poland's eagle, with more ornate art all around the room. |
This was a royal audience chamber, not the dedicated throne room but it served the same function in some instances.
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| IMAGE DESCRIPTION: A tapestry shows one man bludgeoning the other in the head. |
There were several tapestries on this side of the castle telling the story of Genesis. Being both a huge religion nerd and a fan of another musical, Children of Eden, this was cool to see. Here's my man Cain killing Abel.
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| IMAGE DESCRIPTION: A rounded room's ceiling with baroque accents and rococo paintings on the inlays. |
Another room with an incredible ceiling and cool chandeliers.
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| IMAGE DESCRIPTION: A small, baroque chamber of gold and amber colors with dramatic oil paintings. |
This side of the castle was a lot more ornate than when we got in. Like, it gets more and more beautiful the further in you get.
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| IMAGE DESCRIPTION: An ornate, dark-colored room with chandeliers and a throne atop steps draped with a red carpet. |
And you end the tour here, in the legit, real, royal audience chamber. It's huge, dim, and very...dramatic.
We had a dragon to hunt! I'd been hearing murmurs around Krakow about some fire breathing dragon in the castle, and upon looking around, we found the Dragon's Den! For $5, you climb down a long spiral stairwell (watch your head!), and descend the castle wall into a small underground tunnel. This little cave tunnel, according to legend, was the dragon's den.
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| IMAGE DESCRIPTION: Jarrett smiles before a bronze dragon statue perched on a rock in front of a castle. |
And outside the tunnel? We have the real dragon! This is probably the most touristy spot in Krakow, lots of those little tents selling souvenir junk, huge line to take a picture, the like. The statue is equipped to actually breathe fire via a blow torch in its mouth, but we had more important things to do. Our next tour was an Uber away, and the driver was hot on our dragon tails.
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| IMAGE DESCRIPTION: A propaganda poster in Polish shows Volodymyr Zelensky with an unflattering expression photoshopped onto Uncle Sam's body. |
Ah, the simple things that are different in Europe. Hushed, timeless streets, the hourly toll of the church bells, and the most unhinged political graffiti you will ever see. And it's on every surface and probably directed at us.
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| IMAGE DESCRIPTION: A series of panes wrapping around a concrete wall show an array of black and white headshots of people. |
Oskar Schindler's Enamel Factory was next on our agenda. This wasn't exactly something I had looked into or talked about much prior to coming. However, considering Schindler's List is not only a favorite film among my family, but objectively one of the best films ever made (if not the best), I had to come here. We had a guided tour here, also from a woman named Barbara.
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| IMAGE DESCRIPTION: A camouflage-painted tankette points its gun barrel at the camera. |
I am not going to talk much about this as I typically do with the whole "museum infodump" blog post, because honestly, this place was kind of a letdown. It's incredible, but not in the way I was hoping. One thing I learned about Oskar Schindler today was that his story wasn't really common knowledge until Spielberg made his cinematic masterpiece that told the world of his deed. Therefore, for fifty years, this was just an ordinary industrial building. Nothing was done to preserve it and time just went along before circling back to this.
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| IMAGE DESCRIPTION: A tipped aside metal truck holds a hopper of white gravel in a room with pebbles lining the floor. |
Today, Oskar Schindler's factory now serves as a more generic Holocaust museum, albeit an incredibly nice and artistic one, that focuses more on the Nazis in Krakow. Rooms designed to look like town streets with hate signs on the streetcars, the like. This room with gravel on the floor housed a quarry truck from Plaszow Forced Labor Camp not far from here. You may not know Plaszow by name, but if you've seen the film, this scene is etched into your mind. This was where Amon Goeth, played by Ralph Fiennes, famously and chillingly shot prisoners from his balcony over bathtub stains.
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| IMAGE DESCRIPTION: A small, dimly lit office space with windows and a coat rack is furnished with a touch screen and display case, with incandescent lamps hanging from the ceiling. |
This was Oskar Schindler's office in the film, not in real life. But the staircase outside of it was in the movie as well.
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| IMAGE DESCRIPTION: A wooden desk with a portfolio, a black box, a lamp, and some photos on its surface. A map of Europe adorns the wall behind a leather workchair. |
This was Schindler's real office. They actually were unaware of the huge map behind his desk until the place was remodeled and they discovered it. Behind this desk, one man saved millions of lives by doing nothing. The man employed so many Jews, not to get rich, not as a model of German productivity, but to keep them out of the camps. As a matter of fact, this place was a "model of non-production" during the war! Something was always down, something needed a part, anything to avoid actually making munitions for Hitler.
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| IMAGE DESCRIPTION: A tall transparent box is filled to the ceiling of the room with metal pots, plates, and bowls. |
In Schindler's office, an anomalous plexiglass cube is found across the hardwood floor, filled to the brim with metal pots and pans that had been enameled. Why? To remind us that these everyday objects saved lives.
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| IMAGE DESCRIPTION: A cylindrical room has hundreds of names written around its curved surface in typewriter font. |
There are two portals into the metal box on either end, and when you enter, you find yourself in side a cylindrical chamber with hundreds of names surrounding you. This, right here, is Schindler's List. And to see a film and know he saved 1200 people is one thing, but to actually see 1200 names surrounding you from floor to ceiling? It really conveys the scale of Oskar Schindler's heroic deed.
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| IMAGE DESCRIPTION: A Christmas diorama of Stalin hiding under a church with two UNRRA aid workers in crowns. |
Christmas Eve 1945, they had two nativity scenes: one showing two Nazis with Death himself, one showing the Soviets, both hiding from Allied bombings.
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| IMAGE DESCRIPTION: A Christmas diorama showing Hitler, an SS officer, and the Grim Reaper hiding beneath a church. |
"One group is going to die, the other is going to starve," we were told. Happy stuff!
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| IMAGE DESCRIPTION: A crowd moves towards a hallway adorned with an extravagant portrait of Stalin in an elaborate frame bearing a Communist red star, flanked by red flags. |
When you leave a Holocaust exhibit in America, often it ends with liberation and VE Day. Winning the war, Mauthausen's band playing Star Spangled Banner, flag with fifty-six stars, hooray we won the war! But here in Krakow, the ending is a bit more bittersweet. You exit here, to the slow drone of Soviet propaganda music, and the floor is made of rubber to convey the wobbly instability Krakow now faced under totalitarian regime #2.
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| IMAGE DESCRIPTION: A rusty steel cart with a wooden bottom and worn yellow paint reads "8 TRANSPORT 8" in white letters. |
As I said earlier, this place just kind of got swallowed by time, so there's not a lot of original infrastructure from the enamel factory to see. This wagon, they said, is one of the only surviving artifacts used by Schindler's employees.
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| IMAGE DESCRIPTION: A long building with irregular, pointed roof and glass doors. A totem pole sits outside. |
This building was the actual factory floor for Oskar Schindler and his employees. Now, it's been repurposed into a trendy art museum.
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| IMAGE DESCRIPTION: Drew looks through the eyeholes of a large, round stereoscope machine. |
All in all? I did like it, yes, but I felt kind of like I was beating a dead horse as a longtime Holocaust nerd in here. While there was some nice new info in the scope of specifically Krakow, I feel like I didn't learn much because I already knew the stuff. If you're like me and want to come here specifically as someone who likes Oskar Schindler's story or the film, and you're okay with not walking the factory floor as it appeared in the 1940's, go. But if you want to see an authentic, preserved time capsule immortalizing one man's heroism, you might be disappointed. HOWEVER, for a casual Krakow tourist that maybe doesn't want to or can't stomach the horrors of the long day trip to Auschwitz, this might be a good alternative.
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| IMAGE DESCRIPTION: A setup looks like a dark underground bomb bunker, with bunk beds and jarred rations on shelves. |
Honestly, the best thing here is simply the immersive presentation. These aren't just glass cases and placards; it's artistic and immersive and it's the best-looking Holocaust museum I've seen. If you've been to the US Holocaust Memorial Museum in DC, and you did the Daniel's Story children's exhibit, think like that but the whole museum is presented in that same immersive, set-like style.
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| IMAGE DESCRIPTION: A cement storefront reads "APTEKA POD ORLEM" on a sign under a balcony. |
Ghetto Heroes Square was right where the light rail station was, so we figured we'd do one more dark thing before heading back to the light. The pharmacist who ran this shop, Tadeusz Pankiewicz, smuggled in medication and provided lifesaving treatment for the Jews walled up in Krakow's ghetto, which was once where we are standing. This man is another hero.
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| IMAGE DESCRIPTION: A large cobblestoned quad is decorated with large, empty, brazen chairs. |
And finally, right next to the Light Rail, is Ghetto Heroes Square. Everything you see here was once the gateway to a walled off section of town to cram Krakow's Jews into tight quarters, a precursor to the concentration camps. These large, empty chairs you see represent the same as an empty chair at a family dinner or academic commencement: the grim symbolism of one longer with us.
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| IMAGE DESCRIPTION: A hand holds a bagel-like pastry with a stuffed panda stuffed into its hole, a large medieval cathedral rises in the background. |
Here, have something adorable to look at after seeing some of those things. After taking the light rail back to the Old Town, where dinner and the cathedral were, I snagged an Obwarzaniek to hold me over. Polish for Ouroboros, these bagel-like treats are on every street corner. Plus, Noodles fits inside!
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| IMAGE DESCRIPTION: A tall, vaulted cathedral with colorful red and blue walls painted with gold stars. A large pipe organ is framed with gold. |
Drew had asked if we could enter St. Mary's Basilica two days ago, so it was kind of now or never to deliver on that promise, plus I wanted to see it too. This cathedral costs to get in, but trust me, it's worth it.
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| IMAGE DESCRIPTION: A tall Catholic cathedral nave painted dramatically with red and blue colors, with tall stained glass windows, a gold altar, and a large Jesus statue on the cross over it all. |
I love me a good cathedral, and this is a very good cathedral, but Drew had never even seen a large, Catholic cathedral in Europe and this was his first one. Needless to say, he was blown away.
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| IMAGE DESCRIPTION: A tall painted cathedral wall with ornate designs and gold stars on the blue ceiling. |
Here, the art is supposed to resemble a night sky, with twinkling stars of gold against a dark aqua blue field. While I've not been there, conceptually it reminded me of the forest-inspired Sagrada Familia and its design to invoke tall trees.
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| IMAGE DESCRIPTION: A small Catholic shrine with a Christ wearing a crown of thorns on the cross, a painting of a woman with a knife through her heart, and a gold reliquary containing something wrapped in dirty fabric. |
Relics of St. Theodore lived in this gold reliquary. As much as I love these cathedrals, I've not done much relic hunting, so it was cool to see this tradition in person.
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| IMAGE DESCRIPTION: A hazily lit cathedral with glowing golden and crystaline chandeliers under hazy orange sunset through a stained glass window. |
Without getting on a soapbox, while I love these places and I love learning about different religions, I do not actually believe in one myself. To me, this is what makes sense, I am at peace with it, my life is better without it. And while it would be wrong to be a part of this for a number of reasons for me, I can't be the only atheist who sees some of this art, these places, and goes "damn, that's cool! Why can't I have a beautiful place like this for myself to go?" And I think that's kind of the point.
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| IMAGE DESCRIPTION: A small Catholic shrine shows a scene featuring the Pope over a portrait of Pope John Paul II in papal garb. |
Pope Jan Pawel II, or John Paul II, is revered as a saint here in Krakow. The cathedral had a little nook dedicated to him over here.
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| IMAGE DESCRIPTION: A dimly lit nave with golden accents and a red and white stained glass window. |
The lighting we got here was perfect. This might be the most beautiful church I've seen in Europe, and that's not a statement I make lightly.
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| IMAGE DESCRIPTION: A tall, ornate altar of gold with elaborate stained glass windows behind it, rising high in colorful panes depicting Christian art, amid the stars of the building. |
After a romp around, we headed out for our dinner reservation, via an egress with a wheelchair ramp. But this place is absolutely incredible. This is the colorful cathedral, the one that uses not its sheer size, not its coastal mountain location, but the rainbow of Noah to give its congregation that spiritual experience. It was almost like the hand-painted Protestant church of rural Sverige was Catholic.
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| IMAGE DESCRIPTION: A modest but beautiful restaurant with white walls, unfinished wood gabled ceiling, and mirrors decorated with insignias of flying ducks. |
Our dinner reservation was made on our first night, and had to be pushed to the last night as this place was that good. Czarna Kaczka, Polish for "Black Duck," would be our final meal in Krakow. While this was a Polish restaurant, it was giving me "New Nordic" energy both in the decor and food on the menu. Kind of a folk horror vibe of something being beautiful but slightly unsettling in a way that makes it more beautiful.
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| IMAGE DESCRIPTION: A spread of maroon, amber, and coffee-colored vodka shots and a black plate of bread, pate, and pickles. |
Last night in Krakow? Bust out the vodka! We got these spreads of red currant, apple pie, and teakwood-flavored vodkas, wouldn't be complete without the complementary spread of duck pate and pickles.
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| IMAGE DESCRIPTION: A silver roasting pan is filled with a roast duck, potatoes, a baked apple, dumplings, and red cabbage. |
This is the "Before" shot of the Krakow roast duck we got to split. This whole duck (which pains me to eat as they're adorable), was cooked with dumplings, potatoes, Polish red cabbage, and this delicious roast apple stuffed with currants that wasn't even mentioned on the menu. My Polish-French-American grandmother makes the cabbage and potatoes regularly, so I felt like I was at grandma's house.
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| IMAGE DESCRIPTION: An empty roasting pan has only scraps of duck bones and red cabbage strewn about. |
Don't usually do this, but have an "After" photo. One of the best meals of my life, and I am never eating again after this.
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| IMAGE DESCRIPTION: A tall clocktower in Krakow's old town square at sunset. |
Can't leave Krakow without a bang! On the way back, some guy advertising his Indian restaurant asks us "Can I ask you a personal question?" When I reluctantly agree, he starts following us and asks "are you democrats or republicans?" When I answer honestly, and tell him we are on his side, he starts following us grilling us about America's gun laws. While I think we agreed on the policy, I felt uncomfortable, so I told him we would gladly swing by his place to sample the fare and discuss it further with him. Told him our flight was at 3 so we'd be there at 11 to grab lunch and talk American politics before leaving Poland. Just, you know, so he'd stop following us down the street.
Our flight was at 11. While this guy was waiting on us, we were high in the sky on a plane to Germany.
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| IMAGE DESCRIPTION: Jarrett stands under the high starry ceilings of St. Mary's Basilica. |
"The land of your ancestors," my grandmother told me days before I left. Poland was an odd case of me wanting to visit a country, but there were so many weird, little things making me want to go that I couldn't not come here. It's a cold, quiet land that's survived two trips to hell and back, people won't exactly roll out the red carpet for you, but maybe that's a blessing in disguise. You come here, it should be on you to crack that shell. Explore the place, exchange a simple "dzien dobry" with that restaurant server, it's something so wonderful you kind of have to work for it yourself and work your way in a little. It's worth it, I promise.
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| IMAGE DESCRIPTION: Two tall cathedral spires of stone rise into blue skies. |
UP NEXT: Do Widzenia, Polska! Drew and I hop on a flight with the longest layover ever in Frankfurt, with enough time between flights for a beer and maybe to explore Western Germany a little. A crazy Lufthansa flight takes us from the (also crazy) KRK airport to catch a beautiful Rhine river train ride to Cologne, where a beautiful cathedral and a drunk singing German lady awaited! Phase 2, coming right up!
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