Date:7/13/2024-7/24/2024
Destination: Sweden, Denmark
Goal: Coasters and Culture in Sweden and Denmark
Distance: 4286 Miles
Means of Travel: Flight, Boat, Ferry, Bus
Potential Credits: 34
I like roller coasters. And it's an interest that's done a lot for me, in every way possible. Some of the people in my life I love the most I met through this interest. Everyone in my life knows me as the roller coaster guy, despite many other interests of mine. And it's taken me to some pretty cool places! Hershey, Salt Lake City, Orlando, and even Canada! And while I've been traveling since infancy and been overseas several times in my life, it's always to go to France with my family and never to be an enthusiast.
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| Image Description: A red brick building across a body of water, with a spire made of green tarnished copper pillars and holding up a gold cap displaying the three crown symbol of the Swedish monarchy. To the left are colorful older European buildings, to the right are two more modern glass buildings. The blue sky and red tower cast a reflection on the rippled water surface. |
I've wanted to change that for a while. Since I got into coasters, I saw all kinds of cool rides all over the world. And while I was just some dumb high school kid that turned into a dumb college kid and this was something I couldn't do at that point in my life, I knew the world was my oyster. Hypothetically, when the day came, where would I go first? The UK, Germany, and Spain all had stuff that interested me, in 2013 I remember standing in line for my beloved Cheetah Hunt talking to a Swedish couple about the other big awesome green launched coaster being built at Liseberg. And then in 2016, when I was just picking up my obsession with RMC, Sweden got a big epic Topper Track coaster on a rocky mountain. It was settled, my first trip overseas for coasters was to Sweden. That was the goal, and it would be the goal for the next eight years. I was supposed to do this in 2022, but then the situation in Ukraine made me elect to hold off going to a country so close to Russia. Then I was going to wait a year, but in 2022, my car got stolen, shot full of holes, and totaled it, and my insurance lowballed me enough to put a big gaping dent in my travel savings, you've seen the opening sequence to Up you know how it is. Then in 2024, I had all the money I needed, all the time off, Putin isn't launching a full scale invasion of Europe yet, I knew I was able to do this. I had to. Before life once again didn't let me.
Dag 0
After months of losing weight, walking miles a day to get used to it, going off my social anxiety medication cold turkey because it's not legal in Sweden, I finally woke up on that fateful morning.
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| Image Description: A hand holds a red and white package depicting three shortbread cookies with red jam filling. The package reads "Knott's Berry Farm Premium Cookies Raspberry Shortbread." |
My parents were awesome and drove me to CMH to catch my flight out, and we got Sheetz on the way. Knowing damn well it was my last disgusting greasy American food for sometime, I got a quesadilla and a pretzel sandwich and pigged out so I didn't have to get food until much later. Getting to CMH, I did the international thing and got there two hours early to sit around in an airport terminal and work on my novel. Pro tip: If you lose a ton of weight before a trip, don't wear your old jeans through TSA or they'll bunch up in the crotch and set off the scanner. Don't ask how I know. But hey, free cookies in the terminal just to be nice!
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| Image Description: The aisle of an airplane, with a foot wearing jeans and a sneaker sticking out in the aisle between the seats. |
I got a really nice front coach seat on the flight to JFK, giving me all this legroom.
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| Image Description: The tarmac at an airport, with the red green and black tail of a white Emirates plane sticking out from a jetway. |
Everyone was telling me JFK was the nicest New York airport, but considering you're comparing it with disgusting Newark and LaGuardia (never been but I hear horror stories), that's not much of a compliment. What I noticed here were narrow terminals.
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| Image Description: Jarrett, a 30 year old white male with sandy brown hair and green eyes, wearing a colorful black t-shirt with a teal button-down shirt over it and black-rimmed glasses, stands in an airport. Around his neck is a green lanyard decorated with black and yellow sunflowers. |
However, after failing to get one at CMH, I was able to locate a sunflower lanyard to indicate my invisible disability, and they even took down my flight info, sent me to the Delta counter, and told me I could tell them whatever accommodations I needed, they were super kind about it. They let me preboard so I could situate my stuff without a bunch of distracting stuff keeping me from paying attention to what I was doing or hearing directions. To any other travelers with an invisible disability, be it anxiety, autism, ADHD, SPD, whatever you may deal with, this program is absolutely wonderful.
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| Image Description: Jarrett stands in front of the screen for a Delta flight to Stockholm. |
Play the Amazing Race theme, let's fucking goooo we're off to Sweden!
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| Image Description: An iPhone music app plays the song Stockholm Syndrome by Muse. The thumbnail for the album cover depicts a man looking skyward surrounded by shadows of floating people on the ground around him. |
Takeoff song.
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| Image Description: Under orange light, a tray of unappetizing airline food. Among the mix are a packaged brownie, tub of quinoa, and a tub of chicken, rice, and green beans. |
Hey guys! Airline food! LOLOLOLOL
(When they asked if I had any trash, I gave them my tray and said, "yes, that quinoa is definitely trash.")
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| Image Description: Under red-pink light, a plastic cup of red and white wine sit on the edge of an airplane tray. |
When my grandfather was still alive, him and my grandmother would always take Air Canada to France, connect through YYZ, and order a red and a white wine on the plane. On international flights, because of this I always get a white and a red. And our FA was this super nice Swedish woman who was giving out "Swedish pours," filling the cup completely to the top instead of halfway as wine is normally poured into plastic cups.
WELL, as I'm sipping away at these Swedish poured wines, I get a text on my phone. "Donald Trump was shot today." Now, whatever you think is your business, but I personally despise that man. This being said, given the tense political situation in America as is, this was scary to get while flying out of the country.
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| Image Description: An in-flight screen shows a flight path over Scandinavia, with the plane coming in from the west north of Oslo and landing at Stockholm ARN. |
I tried to sleep, very unsuccessfully at that. I tossed and turned, I woke up with my socks missing under the seat in front of me, I got maybe half an hour of sleep on that flight it was fucking awful. And I still had a train and a bus and a walk to the hostel that might not even let me check in yet!
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| Image Description: A box says "MEDITERRANEAN BREAKFAST CALZONE EGG, CHEESE AND SPINACH." |
"Would you like a call zone with eggs or chocolate?" they were asking. The flight attendants were giving out a snack, offering people call zones, whatever the fuck a call zone is. I shrugged and said eggs because it was breakfast time, sort of, and they hand me a calzone.
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| Image Description: The view out a window at rainy airport tarmac. A white plane with curvy orange and yellow stripes on its tail sits under a control tower with a futuristic aesthetic. |
Insult to injury: We deplane, we walk down the long hallway to passport control, and some woman stops us and looks at each passport individually. Turns out there's a computer problem and it can't read any passport that isn't EU or Schengen. Then they put us in the line, it moves so slowly, people have screaming brat kids driving me INSANE, I just wanna go to sleep!
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| Image Description: A hand wearing a blue Apple Watch holds a coffee cup in front of a rail car reading "Arlanda express." |
Once I was through and used my Apple Airtags to find my luggage at baggage claim, I went to go wait on the train as my ticket isn't until 9:30. Got my first Fika while waiting for Arlanda Express, learned that Arlanda Express does not go to Stockholm Södra and that there's an entire different train station I needed, I find that, and get on the train.
Image Description: On left, a buffet of various food. On the right, a series of sausages on rollers.
7-Eleven is huge in Scandinavia for some reason. Swedish 7-Eleven at Arlanda because this is the kind of unhinged content I travel half a world away to bring you, all eight people that read this blog.
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| Image Description: Out the window of a train, with an ad in Swedish depicting a flying horse, a red wooden building sits beside a highway in a lush green field, with woods in the background. |
Kids and teens being horrid little shits would go on to become a theme on this trip, starting here. In my time in Sweden, I had noticed how quiet and soft spoken this country is. And I loved it! I could walk through a crowd and hear myself think and just chill. I get on this train, on comes this group of probably four-five teenagers, and they wouldn't shut up. Everyone is sitting in silence, they're hooting and hollering, I'm cranky and sleep-deprived, god I wanted to tie them to the tracks Wild West style. I think everyone was relieved when they got off.
Okay but look at that view! Seeing how piney, dreary, and misty it was combined with Sweden's signature red rural houses was kind of the first thing that made it sink in that I was here.
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| Image Description: A building of glass, brown, and cream marble with a white sign reading "SÖDRA STATION", with a tall glass atrium that is curved at the top and holds a large analog clock face. |
I get off at Stockholm Sodra station, a train station on the southern end of the city, and catch a bus that took a bit to find due to all the busses that stop there. While waiting, this crabby old Swedish woman named Olga or something sat down and started ranting to me about something in Swedish, my Swedish isn't good enough to understand what it was but she said Stockholm in there. Then on the bus, I missed my stop because I couldn't find the cord to pull, fortunately someone showed me the button but not before I got another half mile between myself and my hostel.
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| Image Description: Jarrett stands on a European city street in front of orange and yellow buildings, near a blue crosswalk sign. |
The walk out there SUCKED. I had to lug my heavy suitcase and camera backpack down three city blocks, using stairs for about a third of it, it's humid, it's early, I'm disgusting from a full day not showering, and I needed fucking sleep. I'm dragging my feet, nodding off as I stroll along, I just want to find this place, honestly, at this point, I'm not in a good mood. But that all changed when I round a corner and out of nowhere comes this...
| Image Description: A city street running adjacent to a body of water where several boats are moored. In the background is the city of Stockholm, Sweden. Colorful Scandinavian buildings, church spires, and a noticeable red brick tower capped with a gold and green tarnished copper spire rise into the sky. The shot is taken uphill from the scene. |
Every trip has that "oh shit" moment, especially somewhere new. You see or experience something that really drives home in your brain just how far from home you are. Walking out of this street uphill from this view of Stockholm was just that for me. City hall, Old Town, the river, everything you see in the travel porn was just laid out right there in front of me. This wasn't some program on the Travel Channel, this wasn't some photo on Google Images, this was Stockholm. Like, Stockholm Stockholm. And I was there.
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| Image Description: At the edge of a cobblestone waterfront sidewalk, a blue and white boat is moored with multiple jetties reaching the ground. "GUSTAF af KLINT" is written on the ship's prow in blue letters. In the background, colorful European buildings can be seen across the water in shades of pink, yellow, red, and orange. |
Gustaf Af Klint was my hostel of choice for this leg of the trip. Never did the hostel thing (mostly because it's barely a thing in America), but figured if I was going to do it, I was going to find the most insane way to do it. This lives up to it! Gustaf Af Klint used to be a Swedish radar survey ship until it was decomissioned, it is now permanently moored in Stockholm where it operates as a hostel.
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| Image Description: A red restaurant booth inside a ship, with dark wood walls and flowers on the table. Two brass lanters jut out from the wall in addition to a porthole. In a frame are several samples of sailing knots. |
Grogily, I dragged my suitcase up the jetty to the ship and explained what was going on. We had spoken over the phone about this possibility, they had said I could just leave my crap in their luggage room if it was too early to check in, so that was a plan I had made. Fortunately for me, they were cleaning my room at the moment anyway, so I was able to just chill out and nod off for twenty minutes.
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| Image Description: A set of single bunk beds, with the bottom one dressed with a simple, thin mattress. The top bunk is missing a mattress and has an open black and purple suitcase and khaki backpack resting on it. The interior of the suitcase is messy. |
Below decks, the smell of harsh cleaning chemicals and decades of mildew accompanied the mechanical drone of a vacuum cleaner cleaning the other crew quarters on the ship. I didn't care, I found my room, and to my good fortune, discovered I was alone in there for now. And even better, the bunk above my bed hadn't been sold, and the little Swedish kid that showed me to my room told me I could throw my stuff up there.
I headed to the shower to discover their setup sucked for privacy. There was a dirty public bathroom with two cramped toilet stalls, a set of sinks, and beyond that a single curtain. Behind that curtain, a little locker room-looking thing with three more stalls, all covered with shower curtains. I was expecting camp showers, something with a smaller communal area but larger private ones, allowing you to dress and redress and put your clothes well away away from the water. I had to get pretty creative with how I did this but I ended up putting my PJs in my Orion drawstring bag and hanging that outside the shower curtain, allowing me to just pull it inside when I was done. Nobody needs to see my sausage and lingonberries!
After this, I laid down on a little more than a prison mattress. This wasn't much more than a sheet of that spiky foam stuff with a single-sized fitted sheet over it, a single pillow, and a duvet on a hard wooden surface. And to be honest? Ordinarily, it would keep me from sleeping. But not today, I was that fucking tired.
| Image Description: A wooden roller coaster with white supports sends a red train down a small first drop at sunset, with two tower rides in the background. The track handrails are strung with incandescent string lights. |
UP NEXT: The first credits in Sweden pack a lot of good things into a small package as I island-hop to Stockholm's iconic Gröna Lund.
